Who I'd Like To Meet

(In honor of my pal SpeedcatHollydale)



Here's The Heads or Tails Meme created by Barb at Skittle's Place. Check here site out for more posts and lots of fun little blip posts.

As usual Barb did not give me enough rules so I'm taking the prompt and running with it. Does the person I want to meet need to be alive? Naw. Too limiting. Do they have to be famous? Heck no. YAWN. Like I'd EVER want to meet Lindsey Lohan. GAG!
I plan on transcending history, death, geography, time travel among other conventions in my quest to list who I'd like to meet.

1. Jesus. Given. Have to ask Him how we on earth have done misinterpreting His words and are they truly His words or did the disciples paraphrase? ;)Mohammed as well. I'd like to see them together discussing God and love and peaceful coexistence.

2. Karl Marx. How exactly is a Utopian society supposed to work when normal people act normally? They are greedy, jealous, want power, lustful, self-centered,etc. How could Marx be so out of touch with reality that he truly believed communism could work in an imperfect society. People are not perfect. They never will be. Was Marx, perhaps, slightly delusional?

3. Laura Ingalls Wilder. As an adult when she lived in Mississippi, happily married to her Manly until death did them part. This was a renaissance woman. From pioneer to farmer to building houses with her husband to creating income by raising chickens when they needed money to writing columns in her local paper that went national. This was one incredible woman who made the best out of every situation in her life. No pity parties. No debilitating depression. A just do it kinda gal.

4. Kate, Margalit, NTE, Wendy, Terri, Summer, Jo, The Queen of Shake-Shake(just cuz I know she'd have me in giggles for hours),Speedcat cuz he's my Uncle,Liv,DeeJay, Eileen,(My ladies from Australia) and so many others. Just one huge Bloggerfest with all the fun kids!

5. Abraham Lincoln. I would like to ask him how he handled the loss of his children. I know he suffered depression and he lost several children and that affected him greatly. I'd like to discuss it with him. Among other things.

6. Martin Luther King. What does he think about today's America and the continuation of racism in it's various forms across the US? How does King view Oprah and Obama and politics in the 21st century?

7. Ghandi. Doesn't everyone want to meet Ghandi just once? He, almost single-handedly crushed the English Empire and was the beginning of the end fo all colonialism in Asia and Africa and the Middle East.

8. Golda Mier. Anyone who can run Israel in the 60's while surrounded by millions of people who hated them and all they stood for is one heck of a woman!

9. Holocaust Survivors. How did they manage to go on with their lives when all was in ruins around them? Such quiet courage is heroic.

My mind is empty once again. Who would you like to meet and why?

That Scary Girl From Math ROCKS!!

The girl who sits next to me in math, and is getting an A, might have just saved my ass. Thank you Oh Scary One! She set me up with a web site that would do this MLA citing that I know nothing about as I am freaking OLD and learned to use footnotes on a typewriter back in the stone age.

I think I want the stone age back. Just looking at the State of The Union Address for 2 nano seconds scared me silly! I knew I couldn't watch it because a)I had homework to redo; b)McHub would be peeved if I threw something heavy at the tv. And to be perfectly honest I have enough of my own issues right now without freaking out over the economy, the war, taxes, blahblahblah. Just. Do. Not. Need. To. Know. Not tonight. Not this month.

I got a lovely D, yes D, on my math test. So much for false confidence. Math makes me feel like a moron. Might at well be a zombie because math will never get me a job and I may not be getting an A.A. if I can't pull thru Alg and then Finite Math for Business spring quarter.

Hard to believe I was considering graduate school someday when I may never get out of community college. HA! I laugh at myself. I'm such a dork.

A Silly Little Thang

I'm feeling sad. It's January and it's always a sad month. For those who are interested please click the link on the right to my other blog, Always in My Heart.
:)


***What Janice Means***(as in what does my NAME mean)


You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.
You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.
You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily.
You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind.
A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.
You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.
At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.


What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?
http://www.blogthings.com/whatsyournameshiddenmeaningquiz/



I got this from purplefrogcat'sblog and thought I go for a much lighter subject matter today. I was cracking up when I saw I'm a type A..........bwahahahaha. So NOT!

Someone, Please Hit Me in The Head w/a Shovel

Call me stupid. I agreed to watch my friend's developmentally disabled son tonight while she goes to her hospital's "holiday" party.

I'm in a bitchy mood. It doesn't happen all that often, but it's here today. They won't get hone until after midnight. That's 7 hours of my time where I could be doing nothing at home! My house doesn't have an annoying cat that I'm allergic to or a dog that love to lick me. NO ONE is allowed to lick Janice! Not even hubby.

We're barely friends since she met the love of her life online. I'm happy she's happy but she really has no time for me. Why did I say yes? In the past 8 months or however long they've been together I've become the person to call only when a sitter is needed. I'm a bitch but it kinda annoys me, ya know.

I am a moron. No doubt about it. Sometimes I wanna be mean and say no freakin' way! What have you done for me lately? I could be mean when I was 15. Why can't I be selfish and mean at 45? Damn my conscience!!!!!!

You Have Restored my Faith

You have restored my faith in friends(even if I cannot "see" you, I feel your presence.), in encouraging words, in cheer leading, and partly in myself.

I think I did pretty well on my math test. I had one problem I only half finished cuz my brain froze but I did all the rest. My issue is I make small mistakes like a minus when the number is positive. This guy is a pretty tough grader but I'm pretty sure I got a C at least.

Another of my advisers told me that Word 2007 will do all my citations for literature for me if I plug in the info! WOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Cuz the MLA stuff kicks my ass. I learned how to do footnotes on a typewriter 1980, for criminy's sake. MLA? APA? Blargh. I went to the bookstore got the discounted, academic full version of Office 2007 for $199. My anxiety level went down by 3 points right there.

My 2nd advisor gave me a great you are so worthy Janice speech! I'm with the Trio group, which handles minorities, poor students and kids who are the first person on their family to go to college. It's federally funded and is a great support system. Y'all did not know I was Pacific Islander, didja? Yup.

BBB is CRANKEE! Tired of headache, bored but cannot really concentrate on anything very long, just starting to eat again. Kid lost 3 lbs from Sunday to Thursday. Little male creep. I could go on a fast and gain weight. Sigh. Almost makes me want to go out and buy the poor thing a Playboy magazine................NAWWWWWWWWWW! You peeps should know me better than that! No Playboys in my house. Nope.

I'm going to load my new Word and chill until later tonight when I'll start on my annotated bibliography.

HUGS for all!!!!

Sure Way to Raise My Axiety Level

I just found out by auto-email response that my academic counselor/my you can do it person is out of the office for a week. WHATTTTTTTTTTTT?*Y&*%^$R%^$#%$& Thanks for the warning email.(grumble, grinchy noises, kinda annoyed)

My anxiety level jumped from a 3 to a 7. I need her to tell me I CAN do it. I'm going to have to do these classes before I graduate, why not just slog through now?

I gave McHub a "script" of what I needed him to say to calm me down, slightly. He's such a good repeater. ;) He will still love if some how I end up dropping out and we have to pay back the financial aid. He said it. Y'all are witnesses. Ahem. I don't think he realized that would be 2 grand. Plus what kind of job could I get?

Let's try a mini-resume:

college education: none per se
job experience: none
stay at home mom experience: 17 years full-time, 3 years part time. Salary? NADA!
cleaning houses: lousy
sitting on my rear whining: EXCELLENT with references.

I'm in trouble. Just suck it up girl and finish the 7 more weeks!!!!

Trying to Bend, Not Break

Here I sit, attempting to figure out how to answer seminar questions about Langston Hughes, The Jazz Age and The Harlem Renaissance. I have done the research, I'm unsure how to write it. Next up is an Annotated Bibliography. Not difficult, just a pain in the rear.

Math midterm tomorrow. No notes allowed. I am supposed to remember how to solve the various problems....Ha. Ha. Ha.

I want to quit, so badly do I want to quit. I won't. I can't. Too easy. Financial aid would have to be paid back. Only 3 classes until the degree. I need to finish this. When it is finished I will appreciate it.

Right now I want to hide under the covers for the rest of my life. Anyone want to hide with me?

Too Antsy To Sit Still

I have that feeling I get when something just isn't right. BBB is still having headaches. He's still getting nausea. I just don't feel right sending him off to school tomorrow.

McHub just said ok. You see, I had worse "something is really wrong" feelings when it came to Brennan. They were right on. I hope I'm wrong this time. Please pray I'm wrong this time.

I'm catching up in math. Lit is still kicking my butt because I am so exhausted.

WARNING: Men don't read next two lines.

I am having my first period in 3.5 years. I'm on non-cycling bc pills and that stops all bleeding. I have cramping, pain in my lower back and I forgot how much this sucks. I'm assuming stress and all is why I'm having breakthrough.

To be honest, I want my Mommy, chocolate chip ice cream and nothing to worry about.

Thursday Thirteen: 13 Reasons Anxiety Sucks

13 Reasons Anxiety Sucks

1. It caused me some weight loss~in my breasts only!(NOT acceptable)

2. All of a sudden my face looks like a sharpei. Wrinkles, wrinkles, wrinkles.

3. McHub is sure I'm over reacting. :P to him.

4. I feel like I have ants in my pants.(No doofs, this is not a sexual reference.)

5. I jump 3 feet anytime someone manages to sneak up behind me. (A chubby middle aged woman jumping is not so pretty.)

6. Concentration? Schmonentration.(I watched Letterman last night and it wore off on me, just a teensy bit.)

7. I'm kinda cranky. Be warned.

8. Any chocolate within 3 miles is MINE! Ya hear me? MINE!

9. Killed off my libido. Dead. (Talk about harshing my buzz.........)

10. It makes me write stupid posts that hurt feelings, sorry Misters. :(

11. I get thoughtless, like driving past my driveway accidentally.

12. I don't clean my house. Wait, I NEVER clean my house anyhow. Snerk.

13. Thoughts keep flying out my ears and I can't catch them. (Maybe this is a GOOD thing.)

Thursday Thirteen

I Love Misty/Apology From A Fool

Oh gosh,

I know you nominated me as a friend/reader who truly thinks I'm funny. I did not mean to diminish that. I appreiciate it that you think I've funny and real. I am honored that you think I'm funny enough to be in contention for an award.

Misty, I freely admit my head is barely even screwed on right now between the stress of the near psychotic drug reaction, BBB's concussion, the issues going on between McHub and I. My intent was never to hurt you. Never.

I guess I feel very inferior to all the humor bloggers who gets hundreds of hits per days or per hour.

I do not understand how I fit into the designation of humor blog.

I should not blog when I'm terrified of failing to get my AA and of having an emotional breakdown in relation.

Confessions of An Anxiety Sufferer

Many folks who cope with depression have an anxiety issue to deal with as well. I am one of those people. Because of the anti-anxiety meds they give you, you can pretend for long periods of time that the anxiety is gone.

Until your 16yo faints and hits his head on the ground. He's had 2 episodes of amnesia, 6 hours throwing up right after head injury, a nurse who could not find a vein and caused the brave one to grit his teeth and say that really hurts. Six hours in an ER from the Dante's 4th circle of hell just capped off the event. I am ever fearful of one of my boys dying. Deep down in my brain this fear hides until it is forced to the surface. Because I lost one child I fear my odds are higher of losing another. Hey, I never said anxiety is logical!

BBB is better but feel like crap which his doctor said he would. He's taken 10 of his 30 T3's in 2 days. I did not send him to school as his balance is not 100%. Bright lights still pierce his eyes like swords as well.

My anxiety right this minute is about failing to finish my AA. I have 2 classes this quarter and am behind. The teachers know the scoop and are being kind as far as they can. I still have to catch up.

The girl next to me in math is coming an hour early to help me tomorrow. Our midterm is Friday~no notes allowed. I get sweaty taking quizzes in math so I hope I can pull a C-.

I'm working on catching up on lit. It's overwhelming so I need to take breaks or I freak myself out.

Thanks for hearing me. My Husband just doesn't get irrational fear. He's tried, it's not in him. Good thing, 2 basket cases in the house would be scary/freaky.

Those anti-anxiety meds need a careful balance. Enough to stave over anxiety attack but not so much that I am in a zone or fall asleep.

I Love Misty/Apology From A Fool

Oh gosh,

I know you nominated me as a friend/reader who truly thinks I'm funny. I did not mean to diminish that. I appreiciate it that you think I've funny and real. I am honored that you think I'm funny enough to be in contention for an award.

Misty, I freely admit my head is barely even screwed on right now between the stress of the near psychotic drug reaction, BBB's concussion, the issues going on between McHub and I. My intent was never to hurt you. Never.

I guess I feel very inferior to all the humor bloggers who gets hundreds of hits per days or per hour.

I do not understand how I fit into the designation of humor blog.

I should not blog when I'm terrified of failing to get my AA and of having an emotional breakdown in relation.

How Did I Get Classified As A Humor Blog?

(This is for Speedcat's Chicken Tuesday)





Seriously, how did this happen and who do I call to relabel?

I am a mommy. A student~sort of. A wife. A person fighting an anxiety attack over late class assignments. DEEP breaths. My life reads like a pathetic Victorian melodrama. I wouldn't believe my life if I hadn't lived it. How did I get classified as a humor blogger?

Mr. Fab is a humor blogger. He's kick ass funny. I get my ass kicked daily by my teenagers.

The Queen of Shake-Shake is funny. Especially when she's wearing her Ho Hat. She's also a moving Mommy Blogger.

The Frog Bog is a humor blog. Froggy thinks of things in a twisted way that makes me laugh out loud. Karl can also be a moving writer as he was when he wrote about his father who passed away last year.

Speedcat Hollydale is the SILLIEST blogger online right now. I can't help but giggle as his um, interesting photos and interpretations.

I am an angst ridden, trying to have a semblance of control over my life, middle aged woman. When did that get funny enough to classify me as a humor blog?

And I thought I was the delusional one...........

(Psssst. If the links don't work cuz I messed up, please go to the side and use the links on Blogs I read. Thank you.)

How Did I Get Classified As A Humor Blog?

(This is for Speedcat's Chicken Tuesday)





Seriously, how did this happen and who do I call to relabel?

I am a mommy. A student~sort of. A wife. A person fighting an anxiety attack over late class assignments. DEEP breaths. My life reads like a pathetic Victorian melodrama. I wouldn't believe my life if I hadn't lived it. How did I get classified as a humor blogger?

Mr. Fab is a humor blogger. He's kick ass funny. I get my ass kicked daily by my teenagers.

The Queen of Shake-Shake is funny. Especially when she's wearing her Ho Hat. She's also a moving Mommy Blogger.

The Frog Bog is a humor blog. Froggy thinks of things in a twisted way that makes me laugh out loud. Karl can also be a moving writer as he was when he wrote about his father who passed away last year.

Speedcat Hollydale is the SILLIEST blogger online right now. I can't help but giggle as his um, interesting photos and interpretations.

I am an angst ridden, trying to have a semblance of control over my life, middle aged woman. When did that get funny enough to classify me as a humor blog?

And I thought I was the delusional one...........

(Psssst. If the links don't work cuz I messed up, please go to the side and use the links on Blogs I read. Thank you.)

How Did I Get Classified As A Humor Blog?

(This is for Speedcat's Chicken Tuesday)





Seriously, how did this happen and who do I call to relabel?

I am a mommy. A student~sort of. A wife. A person fighting an anxiety attack over late class assignments. DEEP breaths. My life reads like a pathetic Victorian melodrama. I wouldn't believe my life if I hadn't lived it. How did I get classified as a humor blogger?

Mr. Fab is a humor blogger. He's kick ass funny. I get my ass kicked daily by my teenagers.

The Queen of Shake-Shake is funny. Especially when she's wearing her Ho Hat. She's also a moving Mommy Blogger.

The Frog Bog is a humor blog. Froggy thinks of things in a twisted way that makes me laugh out loud. Karl can also be a moving writer as he was when he wrote about his father who passed away last year.

Speedcat Hollydale is the SILLIEST blogger online right now. I can't help but giggle as his um, interesting photos and interpretations.

I am an angst ridden, trying to have a semblance of control over my life, middle aged woman. When did that get funny enough to classify me as a humor blog?

And I thought I was the delusional one...........

(Psssst. If the links don't work cuz I messed up, please go to the side and use the links on Blogs I read. Thank you.)

Hitting The Books

I am so behind it's not funny. I feel exactly the way Bill the Cat looks. Math I can catch up with by tomorrow. Lit is going to take huge effort and concentration. Thankfully, I have some of my concentration and focus back. A prayer or two would help. This week is 4th week so I can catch up with effort. I need these two classes at 2.0 to graduate plus a math class next quarter. I want to graduate.

Off to research Langston Hughes and evaluate his poems. Light a candle for me.

Hitting The Books

I am so behind it's not funny. I feel exactly the way Bill the Cat looks. Math I can catch up with by tomorrow. Lit is going to take huge effort and concentration. Thankfully, I have some of my concentration and focus back. A prayer or two would help. This week is 4th week so I can catch up with effort. I need these two classes at 2.0 to graduate plus a math class next quarter. I want to graduate.

Off to research Langston Hughes and evaluate his poems. Light a candle for me.

Hitting The Books

I am so behind it's not funny. I feel exactly the way Bill the Cat looks. Math I can catch up with by tomorrow. Lit is going to take huge effort and concentration. Thankfully, I have some of my concentration and focus back. A prayer or two would help. This week is 4th week so I can catch up with effort. I need these two classes at 2.0 to graduate plus a math class next quarter. I want to graduate.

Off to research Langston Hughes and evaluate his poems. Light a candle for me.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off To The Doctor We Go

BBB has Post Concussive Syndrome. This mean he had several bouts of amnesia after he hit his head Friday night. He has a wicked headache, is very sensitive to light and noise. The very nice Peds doc we saw (waited 4 minutes)presribed tylenol with codeine for head. BBB lives T3's. Dulls the pain enough without numbing his whole body like the morphine he received at the hospital.

Dr. F felt going back to school in Tuesday might be a day or two early and wrote us a lovely note. The Becca bill causes the attendance office to act like parole officers and it offendsme when they question me when I call an excuse in on the phone.

No sports(duh) just rest(almost impossible for this boy, he has me watching Adam Sandler right now).

Thanks for all the comments and prayers and hugs. I heart you.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off To The Doctor We Go

BBB has Post Concussive Syndrome. This mean he had several bouts of amnesia after he hit his head Friday night. He has a wicked headache, is very sensitive to light and noise. The very nice Peds doc we saw (waited 4 minutes)presribed tylenol with codeine for head. BBB lives T3's. Dulls the pain enough without numbing his whole body like the morphine he received at the hospital.

Dr. F felt going back to school in Tuesday might be a day or two early and wrote us a lovely note. The Becca bill causes the attendance office to act like parole officers and it offendsme when they question me when I call an excuse in on the phone.

No sports(duh) just rest(almost impossible for this boy, he has me watching Adam Sandler right now).

Thanks for all the comments and prayers and hugs. I heart you.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off To The Doctor We Go

BBB has Post Concussive Syndrome. This mean he had several bouts of amnesia after he hit his head Friday night. He has a wicked headache and is very sensitive to light and noise. The very nice Peds doc we saw (waited 4 minutes)prescribed tylenol with codeine for the kid's head. BBB lurves T3's. Dulls the pain enough without numbing his whole body like the morphine he received at the hospital.

Dr. F felt going back to school in Tuesday might be a day or two early and wrote us a lovely note. The Becca bill causes the attendance office to act like parole officers and it offends me when they question me when I call an excuse in on the phone.

No sports(duh) just rest(almost impossible for this boy, he has me watching Adam Sandler right now).

Thanks for all the comments and prayers and hugs. I heart you.

Janice and Freud

I never ever thought I would say this. Freud did not have his head up his rear. He was RIGHT ON when it came to coping mechanisms because I've used most of them since 1996.

Humor-we can all see this.

Denial~it's amazing I did not drown

Displacement~my immediate family

Repression~not so much

Isolation~which I did everytime I began to get depressed.

Classically emotion centered coping.

Symptoms from some of these~headaches, backaches,muscle tension, elevated blood pressure.

I apologize Mr. Freud I judged you based on two of your other theories without seeing the plank in my own eye.


New Post at In My Heart Forever

Janice and Freud

I never ever thought I would say this. Freud did not have his head up his rear. He was RIGHT ON when it came to coping mechanisms because I've used most of them since 1996.

Humor-we can all see this.

Denial~it's amazing I did not drown

Displacement~my immediate family

Repression~not so much

Isolation~which I did everytime I began to get depressed.

Classically emotion centered coping.

Symptoms from some of these~headaches, backaches,muscle tension, elevated blood pressure.

I apologize Mr. Freud I judged you based on two of your other theories without seeing the plank in my own eye.


New Post at In My Heart Forever

Amended

I think I. gave the wrong idea. We have 10 hospitals in the Seattle metro area. Some are better than others. We chose the local er because it's five miles away. I contemplated Children's but that's 30 miles away and I did not want the kid to brain bleed out because I had a wild imagination and because the drive took 25 minutes versus 3.

It's not the greatest er and I won't go into the horrors we had with Brennie his one and only visit.

It is presumptuous of me to say they did it wrong.

I was describing an event from my very scared mind.

I will never work ER if I make into LPN school and if I can hack it enough to get my license. After watching it all(admittedly from an extreme POV) I have a feeling nursing is gonna be a total bitch to pass. Doesn't mean I can't. I think I got another reality check.

Amended

I think I. gave the wrong idea. We have 10 hospitals in the Seattle metro area. Some are better than others. We chose the local er because it's five miles away. I contemplated Children's but that's 30 miles away and I did not want the kid to brain bleed out because I had a wild imagination and because the drive took 25 minutes versus 3.

It's not the greatest er and I won't go into the horrors we had with Brennie his one and only visit.

It is presumptuous of me to say they did it wrong.

I was describing an event from my very scared mind.

I will never work ER if I make into LPN school and if I can hack it enough to get my license. After watching it all(admittedly from an extreme POV) I have a feeling nursing is gonna be a total bitch to pass. Doesn't mean I can't. I think I got another reality check.

Janice and Freud

I never ever thought I would say this. Freud did not have his head up his rear. He was RIGHT ON when it came to coping mechanisms because I've used most of them since 1996.

Humor-we can all see this.

Denial~it's amazing I did not drown

Displacement~my immediate family

Repression~not so much

Isolation~which I did everytime I began to get depressed.

Classically emotion centered coping.

Symptoms from some of these~headaches, backaches,muscle tension, elevated blood pressure.

I apologize Mr. Freud I judged you based on two of your other theories without seeing the plank in my own eye.


New Post at In My Heart Forever

Amended

I think I. gave the wrong idea. We have 10 hospitals in the Seattle metro area. Some are better than others. We chose the local er because it's five miles away. I contemplated Children's but that's 30 miles away and I did not want the kid to brain bleed out because I had a wild imagination and because the drive took 25 minutes versus 3.

It's not the greatest er and I won't go into the horrors we had with Brennie his one and only visit.

It is presumptuous of me to say they did it wrong.

I was describing an event from my very scared mind.

I will never work ER if I make into LPN school and if I can hack it enough to get my license. After watching it all(admittedly from an extreme POV) I have a feeling nursing is gonna be a total bitch to pass. Doesn't mean I can't. I think I got another reality check.

Simply Unbelievable

Let's skip ahead to last night.

BPB was out.

McHub and I, who've had some harsh yet enlightening discussions in the past 7 days, had settled in on the love seat to watch that intellectual of all Friday night shows "Las Vegas".

Yesterday was the first day I wasn't jumpimg out of my skin, muscle twitches had stopped and racing inner voice had shut up. As close to manic as I ever want to get.

We hear the outer door open. We looked at one another, puzzled.

A man I don't know, BBB's friend Teej and BBB(who was the color of wall paste) walked in.

Backtrack, we had allowed BBB to go to a concert at UW. Teej's brother is a straight A clean cut student there.

The man was Teej's dad, a Seattle firefighter. He explained that 15 minutes into the concert BBB fainted, hit his head on the floor and had been throwing up all the way home(30 minute drive at speed limit).

My first thought, "God, please don't let him die." An over reaction for most people except those of us who've already watched one child. yup, anaxiety racheted up from 1 to about a seven.

Since I have my first aid and CPR cards current, the dad hero talked to me. He thought a slight concussion and BBB had passed out from heat, the sounds waves from the speakers.

I said, "ER". Dad hero hesitated and said if you watched all night he "should " be ok.

Not good enough. I said "ER" again. Fire hero said ok if it were my child that is where I'd go.

Teej and dad left.

Geo was holding BBB up. Geo did not want to go to ER. (Later I figured out why~he had to work today at 5:30a.m.)

I called Char, my friend the RN, BSN manager of NICU and she said ER. Geo gave in without grace.

BBB was hurling into the kitchen sink. No alcohol had been drunk, no illegals consumed.

Off to a version of hell on earth.

20 minutes just to place name in triage list.

1 hour before we say triage nurse. His color was better. He was oriented x3 if not quite alert. She said maybe we'd get back in an hour.

My very vivid imagination had the kid dropping dead of a subdural hemotoma in the waiting room. They are rebuilding an ER tower so space was very limited. Everytime ER door open a blast of 29 degree air flood in.

Took 2 xanax before I could rush the ER desk, take a CT tech hostage and do it myself. Yes, I know I'm delusional. This is my baby. This is my hope.

We get taken back at 12:45a.m. Undressed kid. Got a urine sample. Took a blood sugar. Asked pain level~7 he said. Nurse brought needles, zophran and morphine. She missed his vein, no joke, 6 times. He, my stoic one, was saying that really hurts. After it was in, bruises from sticks began.

Zophran killed nausea w/in seconds, morphine was declared cool. In fact, he'd like some now as they sent us home w/o any pain killers.

DH left and BPB waited out in the waiting room and then his car after watching the freak show.

Kid got his CT. Clean. Electrolyte levels good. Blood sugar 104, very hydrated after 2 bags of .09 NaCl.

They let us go at 3:45a.m.

Today he cannot bend his left elbow. His head and neck hurt.

Their diagnosis food virus, poisoning plus vaso-vagel reaction(fainting).

My diagnosis~I will never work in an ER. It was like the fourth circle of hell.

Simply Unbelievable

Let's skip ahead to last night.

BPB was out.

McHub and I, who've had some harsh yet enlightening discussions in the past 7 days, had settled in on the love seat to watch that intellectual of all Friday night shows "Las Vegas".

Yesterday was the first day I wasn't jumpimg out of my skin, muscle twitches had stopped and racing inner voice had shut up. As close to manic as I ever want to get.

We hear the outer door open. We looked at one another, puzzled.

A man I don't know, BBB's friend Teej and BBB(who was the color of wall paste) walked in.

Backtrack, we had allowed BBB to go to a concert at UW. Teej's brother is a straight A clean cut student there.

The man was Teej's dad, a Seattle firefighter. He explained that 15 minutes into the concert BBB fainted, hit his head on the floor and had been throwing up all the way home(30 minute drive at speed limit).

My first thought, "God, please don't let him die." An over reaction for most people except those of us who've already watched one child. yup, anaxiety racheted up from 1 to about a seven.

Since I have my first aid and CPR cards current, the dad hero talked to me. He thought a slight concussion and BBB had passed out from heat, the sounds waves from the speakers.

I said, "ER". Dad hero hesitated and said if you watched all night he "should " be ok.

Not good enough. I said "ER" again. Fire hero said ok if it were my child that is where I'd go.

Teej and dad left.

Geo was holding BBB up. Geo did not want to go to ER. (Later I figured out why~he had to work today at 5:30a.m.)

I called Char, my friend the RN, BSN manager of NICU and she said ER. Geo gave in without grace.

BBB was hurling into the kitchen sink. No alcohol had been drunk, no illegals consumed.

Off to a version of hell on earth.

20 minutes just to place name in triage list.

1 hour before we say triage nurse. His color was better. He was oriented x3 if not quite alert. She said maybe we'd get back in an hour.

My very vivid imagination had the kid dropping dead of a subdural hemotoma in the waiting room. They are rebuilding an ER tower so space was very limited. Everytime ER door open a blast of 29 degree air flood in.

Took 2 xanax before I could rush the ER desk, take a CT tech hostage and do it myself. Yes, I know I'm delusional. This is my baby. This is my hope.

We get taken back at 12:45a.m. Undressed kid. Got a urine sample. Took a blood sugar. Asked pain level~7 he said. Nurse brought needles, zophran and morphine. She missed his vein, no joke, 6 times. He, my stoic one, was saying that really hurts. After it was in, bruises from sticks began.

Zophran killed nausea w/in seconds, morphine was declared cool. In fact, he'd like some now as they sent us home w/o any pain killers.

DH left and BPB waited out in the waiting room and then his car after watching the freak show.

Kid got his CT. Clean. Electrolyte levels good. Blood sugar 104, very hydrated after 2 bags of .09 NaCl.

They let us go at 3:45a.m.

Today he cannot bend his left elbow. His head and neck hurt.

Their diagnosis food virus, poisoning plus vaso-vagel reaction(fainting).

My diagnosis~I will never work in an ER. It was like the fourth circle of hell.

Short But Sweet

Thank you for the worry and the prayers!! You are terrific.

I had an extremely bad reaction from my newest medication and this caused complete insomnia(72 hours w/o sleep) and a severe anxiety attack.

I have now slept and will be recovered fully soon.

Back when I catch up on all the things I have been sliding on at school.

Hugs to you all.

Short But Sweet

Thank you for the worry and the prayers!! You are terrific.

I had an extremely bad reaction from my newest medication and this caused complete insomnia(72 hours w/o sleep) and a severe anxiety attack.

I have now slept and will be recovered fully soon.

Back when I catch up on all the things I have been sliding on at school.

Hugs to you all.

Short But Sweet

Thank you for the worry and the prayers!! You are terrific.

I had an extremely bad reaction from my newest medication and this caused complete insomnia(72 hours w/o sleep) and a severe anxiety attack.

I have now slept and will be recovered fully soon.

Back when I catch up on all the things I have been sliding on at school.

Hugs to you all.

Closed for repairs

No new posts for a couple of days because frankly, I don't want to talk about it.

Closed for repairs

No new posts for a couple of days because frankly, I don't want to talk about it.

Closed for repairs

No new posts for a couple of days because frankly, I don't want to talk about it.

I've Just Realized I'm Switzerland

in this war. Actually, it's more of a pissing contest than a war, but let's not quibble. I'm stuck in neutral. We all know how well that turned out for The Nazi Puppet State!

Is any family truly functional? Seems like people fake functionality to me. We all know if it's on TV it's an example of what not to do. Ah...TV...sex, sex, ads, ads, talking heads frantically calling out trying to get your attention so you can spend your money on them. Whether it's politics or sex or pharmaceutical giants all they want is our money which translates into power which translates into major corruption.
Yes, the glass is half-empty tonight!

Yup, crashed hard and burned out this week. It's by far, the worst week I've had since mid-November. Speaking of November....I went on McHub's computer and he calls me out on it. Hmmmmmm, what happened to: sure honey, you can check on it anytime you want?

And the WORST! I knew it was coming. He went and said it out loud tonight. The dreaded phrase guaranteed to make me want to scalp him with a tomahawk.............







Here we go again.


And the hope of a true new beginning fades into the sunset.

I've Just Realized I'm Switzerland

in this war. Actually, it's more of a pissing contest than a war, but let's not quibble. I'm stuck in neutral. We all know how well that turned out for The Nazi Puppet State!

Is any family truly functional? Seems like people fake functionality to me. We all know if it's on TV it's an example of what not to do. Ah...TV...sex, sex, ads, ads, talking heads frantically calling out trying to get your attention so you can spend your money on them. Whether it's politics or sex or pharmaceutical giants all they want is our money which translates into power which translates into major corruption.
Yes, the glass is half-empty tonight!

Yup, crashed hard and burned out this week. It's by far, the worst week I've had since mid-November. Speaking of November....I went on McHub's computer and he calls me out on it. Hmmmmmm, what happened to: sure honey, you can check on it anytime you want?

And the WORST! I knew it was coming. He went and said it out loud tonight. The dreaded phrase guaranteed to make me want to scalp him with a tomahawk.............







Here we go again.


And the hope of a true new beginning fades into the sunset.

I've Just Realized I'm Switzerland

in this war. Actually, it's more of a pissing contest than a war, but let's not quibble. I'm stuck in neutral. We all know how well that turned out for The Nazi Puppet State!

Is any family truly functional? Seems like people fake functionality to me. We all know if it's on TV it's an example of what not to do. Ah...TV...sex, sex, ads, ads, talking heads frantically calling out trying to get your attention so you can spend your money on them. Whether it's politics or sex or pharmaceutical giants all they want is our money which translates into power which translates into major corruption.
Yes, the glass is half-empty tonight!

Yup, crashed hard and burned out this week. It's by far, the worst week I've had since mid-November. Speaking of November....I went on McHub's computer and he calls me out on it. Hmmmmmm, what happened to: sure honey, you can check on it anytime you want?

And the WORST! I knew it was coming. He went and said it out loud tonight. The dreaded phrase guaranteed to make me want to scalp him with a tomahawk.............







Here we go again.


And the hope of a true new beginning fades into the sunset.

The Y Chromosome

There is something to be said about the males of the human species. Because they have a Y chromosome instead of the extra X, they have testosterone. Because of this testosterone males have a event that occurs when an older male has teenage male progeny. It's some ancient malarkey with a dash of BS thrown in.

I watched my father rage his way through this with my brothers. NOT a pretty sight.

I watched McHub play the "my cajones are bigger than yours" game with BPB a few years back. While this behavior does have a peak, the interaction pattern lasts for several years.

Last night McHub and BBB had their flash point. On my, there was drama! BBB has late start this a.m. meaning his classes do not started until 9:30a.m. Because of late start I let BBB hang with his friend K until 9p.m. last night. BBB comes in and wants something.

McHub and I are sitting there, he watching American Awful and I was attempting to catch up on my lit homework. BBB asks if he can sleep over at K's house. Dum, Dum, de DUM. I say no. He gets bent. Asks why in his oh so I'm pissed at these morons voice.

He goes out door to tell his pal. Comes back in. "You can call his mom."

Me, "Nope. Doesn't matter. I said no. I detest last minute things..."

McHub steps into our conversational jungle which is always rife with teenage drama and danger,
"Why are you eyes looking red?"

BBB gives a OH NO YOU DIDNT! look and the game is on.(I am so rolling my eyes by now)

"Are you ACCUSING me of something?" screeched young Obi Wan.

"Your eyes look red and asking I was.", claimed Yoda in a passive yet aggressive voice.

Screech, screech~~~PA comments and attitude from Yoda.

Young Obi Wan leaves the ship screaming, "I'm not staying here with HIM. I'm so gone!" Slamming door commences.

Now here where I get screwed by being,


wait for it...................



rational.

yeah. Bytes, don't it?

Yoda begins in on me and how we should go and fetch young Obi Wan as one fetches a runaway 5 year old.

I calmly explain that this approach will not work. Kid is 16 and one cannot grab his 72 inch body by the ankles and drag him home.

The attack commences. The second honeymoon is SO over.

"So we're just gonna let him sleep over there!! Huh! Huh? He has no right to feel the force... blahblahblah." Yoda badgers.

So I have pissed off my middle-aged man who's gonna pop a stroke cuz he lives on fat and salt and sugar called fast food. His territory is in danger. He's on full "I need to pee on my area" alert!

Young Obi Wan is all super angry at his friend's house. This is not the end of this.

I'm in the middle. Everyone hates me right now. Because the drama commenced at 9p.m. my lit assignment will be late.

I'm irked because they are harshing on my buzz. It really sucks when you crash land face first.

Going along fine. No major conflicts just staying the course.

Anyone have any animal tranqs handy?

I think Yoda needs to be sedated for a day or two.

P.S.~Did I mention my almost migraine? Yeah, sucks to be me today.

A Few Minutes From The Mind Of JANICE!

(cue soap opera music)

Announcer with HUGE deep voice says: Just like a complex and never ending work of M.C.Escher art is The Mind of Janice....(music swells)

I think I'm going to start writing episode scripts for TV. The writers aren't writing, the studios are sitting on their dwindling piles of gold dust among the whores in a cathouse(called Hollywierd), and I, Janice can write just as well as several of the now repeating endlessly dramas and sit-coms. Reality TV isn't real and "original" television programs is a mega-oxymoron and hey~why NOT sell my soul?

I'm sitting in my family room withOUT the TV on. I am tired of the noise, Noise, NOISE! just like Suess' Horton. Enough of the pharmaceutical ads, age reducing moisturizing creams, embarrassingly horrid Pepto Bismal commercials. STOP. I say with authority and touch of whimsy; ess tee oh pee! NOW.

Chill out for a moment, listen to the silence, try and find some familiarity with the stillness we need for our souls to survive. Relax. Take some deep breaths. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Nice. Very nice. No need for alcohol when I'm on antidepressants, probably forever. Hey, big deal. Mellow is a feeling. Not just a sexual lubricant sold at your local Rite Aid. (wrinkling my cute nose in disgust)

Has anyone besides me(I'm ever so self-involved), noticed how extremely IN YOUR FACE sexual life has gotten in red blooded America? Does it seem like Las Vegas picked up and moved into your backyard? Casinos everywhere. Commercials that would have my stout, earthy Hungarian grandmother fainting...where does it end? A real question for you~WHERE does it end?

Heads or Tails: The 3rd Letter of The Alphabet

Heads or Tails Tuesday, go see Barb at Skittlesplace, This friend invented the Heads or Tails Tuesdays which are a combustible bunch of bloggers who are creative and love cookies. Check them out at Barb's.

I am going to do a modified stream of consciousness style of writing. I really hates James Joyce, a famous Irish author who is constantly mentioned when one talks stream of consciousness writer. There is no punctuation or spaces or capitals or paragraphs in true SOC but ya all know I like to bend rules, which truly makes it all hot stream that I wish would disappear into the air.


C is for cookie as Barb has sang
C is for cookoo which you know I am
C is for crazy friends with whom I hang
C is for Samuel Taylor Coleridge who's poem I was forced to read
C was for cranky for being forced to peruse this scanky creed
C is for chewing gum which is commencing presently
C is for clean minty fresh breath
C is for computer which is crotchedy tonight neverendingly irritating me
C is for couplet which is another poetry term
C is for crap for that is what I write
C is for my collapsed brain, brought low by exhaustion and microscopic spores of pollen and cold weather.


Today at 5a.m.~
C is for CHILLEEEEEEE! It's 33 degrees outside, 60 inside.
C is for cash as I received my financial aid check yesterday.
C is for coping on 5 hours sleep, much more than I used to get when boys were cheeps
C is for chicken with ceiling on his head
C is for chocolate which I might eat even when I am dead
C is for crock such as this great election year
C is for caucuses and candidates with results that make us all jeer and desire to kick them in the rear
C is for chumps that won't pay the writers dear which shall culminate in no viewers here
C is for cultivating my upbeat attitude
C is for comedy, my idea is Bugs Bunny
C is for curve, the smile on my mouth.

Have I Told You How Cool I Am??

Have I Told You How Cool I Am......?

.....I am cool because yes that IS me in the picture with the cast of House and yes Hugh and I have a "thing" going on.

.....I took the Nelson Denny reading test for my LPN school application and I got the highest score they have ever seen at that testing center. (Shhhhhhhhhhhhh, let me keep the "in the top 1% buzz" for a few days)

.....I mailed my application in today and have great faith they will choose me to be one of their 40 students for the class of 2009. (It's a lottery so my stellar intelligence don't really count as helping me getting accepted.)

.....My 16yo is annoying the crap out of me and yet, I still haven't smacked him upside the head.

.....I still order special and new lingerie to keep the homefires burning.

.....I have green eyes. (Mwahahahaha, only several of you will get that.)

.....I read textbooks like Microbiology: Principles and Explorations and An Introduction to Brain and Behavior just because I love learning.

.....My unique and quirky sense of humor.

.....I care about others, not just my friends and family but for our "brothers" as Jesus directed us to care.

.....I care deeply about my country and how much work it will take to fix all the problems we having going on.

.....I volunteer.

.....I have come to the other side of my baby's illness and death and I will live better and more happily because of it. (Only took me 12 years...)

.....I am me, all the time.

Reasons I Heart My Hubby

My friends, my McHub has absolutely no interest in my blog. He has never read it unless I forced him to. He says this is my thing. I guess that means really stupid sports on tv is HIS thing. Whatever. I don't think he even knows I can write fairly well when I'm in the mood. It's one of those things that makes us opposites. He Hates writing! He disliked school. He doesn't feel it's his mission in life to stuff as much info into his brain as possible before he dies, I do feel that is my mission. It's also my mission to always be reading something. I watch television that takes an IQ over 15 to comprehend. He likes fart humor and Adam Sandler....I don't. Except The Water Boy. I crack up at The Water Boy.

These are some reasons I Heart my spouse of 21 years and 6 months.

1. I knew he was the man I would marry by our second date. Don't ask me how, I just did.

2. He was one of the first truly kind men I had met as an adult.

3. He bought me new tires as a gift when we'd only been dating two weeks. He was worried about my safety.

4. He liked me for who I was, at 24. He did not care I still didn't have my degree from UCSD.

5. He pretended to like swimming in the ocean even though he really hated it. I did not find out he really couldn't swim(not like me the lifeguard at least)for months.

6. We would go to lunch at the beach after we picked up health food(So Cal peeps, they called everything health food)and would eat and watch my favorite thing...the waves. He knew without me ever telling him.

7. He was sweet to my brothers who were total and complete morons.

8. He was a teaching tennis pro and had the best legs and rear end I had ever seen in my life.

9. He helped me meet Walter "Sweetness" Payton during a celebrity tennis tournament that was held at the resort we worked at. Sweetness had the second best legs and rear end I have ever seen!

10. He believes marriage means through sickness and health, poor and rich, demented and depressed, live children and sick, dying children and somehow he knew I would eventually be back. 12 years later and I am back, different but alive and hopeful again. (Even if I hadn't come back, he still would have stuck by me.)

11. We still make each other hot!

12. He does the boys laundry.

13. He used to be the puke cleaner upper(makes me swoon).

14. He wants me to be whatever and whoever I want to be career-wise. (Even if he gets frustrated on occasion.)

Prolly a hundred other things. There's also a hundred that drive me crazy but that's another list for another day. :)

Janice Is A Happy Married Woman!!!!

This man makes me very very happy when he gets home 4 hours early from work! No kids at home. No chores to do. No one to pick up. Let's just say we found some very entertaining methods of exercising!!! WAAAAHOOOOOOOOO!

ME Sick, ME Unhappy

Somebody gave me a nasty headcold or some evil virus.....I don't feel so hot. Seriously. My head is full of concrete snot, tummy not so great, headache, dizzy and my ears are CLOGGED! This SUCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! I need a healer, now please.


Love my friends. Going to lie on the coach(Rats can't, feel too crappy) I mean couch and watch Grey's.


HUGE HUGGLES and I'm wearing my invisible germ shield so you won't catch any of my germs!!!! :)

BWAHAHA Uncle Hollywood Get Creative.....

Even thought I feel I look more like this VV at awards....................................





Speedcat Hollywood thinks I look more like this.......................VVVVV.


When did my hair get so dark and face so scary??? EEK!

Woe Is ME! WOE IS MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Oh dear. Oh dear me. The networks cancelled The Golden Globes. Holy Crud! What am I supposed to do with my designer dress? It cost me $7000. My shoes cost almost as much, not to mentioned my new doamond necklace, earrings, rings and bracelets. I'm sooooooooooooooooo upset. You should have heard the horror in Hugh's voice when he called me to cancel. Poor guy. He knew he'd be getting lucky that night..........and now.....no way jose!!!!! If I'm gonna put out I want to go star watching first. I want to rub elbows with the Who's WHO of Hollywierd!! Don't we all have this dream? Everyone wants to be a star on Hollywierd Blvd, don't they?

Heads Or Tails Tuesday : New?

Barb, my cool pal from Skittles Placeis starting a new year for my favorite meme Heads or Tails Tuesday! Topic this week is New for those of us who like to view things with a twist. :)

I have a new attitude. One that focuses on my good points and successes. I will be applying for the LPN program this week. Yes, I still want to be a BSN but it's not practical for the family at the moment so I will happily take what I can get. This is not new, but my goal is to help other and give back to society. I can givback at an LPN as I could as an RN it will take me a tad longer. No big deal.

I may be almost 46 but I feel 30 physically and my brain works very well still. Unless some disease happens I know I have 25 years at least to live a productive work life. A life where I help people outside my family where the last 20 some years I have been helping the people within my family the most.

I know those of you in medical care understand what I mean. I don't want to be in the spotlight. I want to be the person the patient remembers as friendly and helpful and perhaps, even amusing. Laughter is very healing!!!!!!!!!!!!

Something Found and DYJHIW?

Well, I went back to the college web site and guess what I found hiding in an unexpected place? Yes! The LPN application with copious instructions. I need to take some reading test, do the orientation tomorrow afternoon and then I can mail it in in the specified 12inx9in manila envelope. WOOHOOOOOOO! I have everything else I need. Yeehaw.

Since I ranted all over Madness! Madness I say! aka Liv's blog I thought I'd do some of my Don't You Just Hate it Whens.........?


DYJHIW your 19yo walks in 2 hours before you expected him?

DYJHIW your 16yo spends the whole frickin' weekend at home?

DYJHIW your sexy husband spends the entire weekend on a worm in his laptop?(I guess this could sound dirty to some minds but that was not my intention, honest!) It is now fixed. :)

DYJHIW it's only January and you are so sick of the presidential candidates you could just puke all over one of them?

DYJH health insurance companies? Big pains in the asses they are.

DYJHIW there's still a writer's strike(and I fully support the writers demands) and there's only one new episode of House left? I will also miss Pushing Daisies, ER, Grey's. Prison Break will be new though!! Need to see some hot men w/o their shirts on soon!!!!

Cripes! DYJHIW McHub walks in ALONE and just as I'm stalking him, his cell phone rings? Flutter? I need me some very young and strong cabana boys please!

Why don't ya'll tell me what you just hate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Surprise! It's Raining, In Washington, In January!!!!

I mock myself with the title. It ALWAYS rains in January in the Western Washigton, aka Seattle, area. Always. Lake Janice will be making her appearance soon. I spent the night listening to very strong winds and hard rain. I am tired. Usually I sleep through all this but the wind was stronger than normal. Nothing more dull than waking up 5 times in the middle of the night. It's cold, everyone's asleep, nothing on tv, too tired to read...........bleh.

I'm a bit at loose ends. I'm used to having at least one really difficult class. One I start studying for before the first week of classes is over. Not this quarter. No anatomy and physiology, no flash cards, no coloring books, no weekly lab quizzes to study for, no chapters to read in the 1300 page book.......one would think I'd be happy. I feel...restless. I was trying to do my application for the LPN program yesterday and they have taken the application OFF the internet and it appears that they have changed the way they take applications. Wanna see Janice have a temper tantrum? Come back Monday.

I cannot believe they'd change everything while the student body was on vacation. I have no idea what I will do if the LPN is no longer available to me. Besides being pissed off.

Sometimes I believe colleges like messing with our heads. Anyone know what I mean?